Showing posts with label حاجات من بلوجي القديم............. Show all posts
Showing posts with label حاجات من بلوجي القديم............. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

حاجات من بلوجي القديم............

In the last few days I have been trying to learn more about myself..I had time since long ago to dig in..I thought about my future,my abilities,my dreams,expectations,,even the one I want to marry.

I think what I was really trying to find is my thing..yes The thing that I was born to do..The thing that I will be the best in it..i didn't find it yet but I am happy Iam on this road..

So many things are happening..Iam being put in many tests,,many expereicings and Iam scared to death from failing or letting anyone down.

Generaly I think Iam in a very tricky period of my life now..And I am very scared..My exams results are about to show and Iam totally terrifiaed to the extent that Iam afraid to talk about it,,,This year I took many risks,many bets....I was very different from the way I used to be every year in this collge.. I played the game of calm cold person...no stress no pressure...But I think I did-or even tried to do a good job really........

I still have one subject to go ..Pediatrics and I really wanna work hard on that one regardless the results of the other...For one reason which is that I have tasted the joy of getting knowledge..enjoying sceince ..I t isn't as dull as it used be earlier..Things get easy,fun...really...I think that is what learning about.And that is your way of loving what you work,,do or study...That's what will make me great doctor...

حاجات من بلوجي القديم............

Friday, November 2, 2007
I have so many things I want to do..I feel trapped...With no wayout of where Iam ..The place..The time..The everything...I don't know ...But Iam unhappy..I know Iam unhappy but Iam ok with it..Coz there is nothng I can do to change it.Iam not in a classic case of depression..Noo..Iam just having so many unfinished business..Iam rushing things maybe..But I feel also stuck...I was in a gathering yesterday with a bunch of people who arn't my close friends.I wasn't comfortable at all..And I had this usual feeling that all my insecuritures are rabbing me up like a spider web..I was alone ..I don't feel that when my friends around that's why I chruch every moment I spend with them..So many pretending in the air..Sense of compitition even in the smallest silliest thing..Well maybe coz I was around one of very compitive person..I don't know...There are so many wrong things in this world..So many contraverses,,Sometimes I feel like Iam holding the world wiht one hand..Other I feel like Iam beneath the earth.....I can't hold up to one thing that keeps me surviving..I know I need to work my ass hard all the time to achieve what I want..I know I have all what it takes to be someone who makes a huge differernce..Iam just overwhelmed by too many things..